Square Squad

Based on John 15:9-17

Jesus said, “You are my friends if you do what I command you.” This line is from what Biblical scholars refer to as Jesus’ farewell discourse. John 14-17 is this long speech that Jesus gives just before everything goes down with his arrest and everything that followed. It is Jesus’ opportunity to tell his disciples the most important things in this time of calm before the storm. It is this discourse that we have been looking at for the past few weeks. Today, I invite us to focus in on what it means to claim Jesus as a friend.

What is a friend? There are all kinds of definitions. But as I thought of what a friend is, I thought of this classic song written by James Taylor and Carole King:

When you're down and troubled

And you need a helping hand

And nothing, oh, nothing is going right

Close your eyes and think of me

And soon I will be there

To brighten up even your darkest night

You just call out my name

And, you know, wherever I am

I'll come running

To see you again

Winter, spring, summer or fall

All you've got to do is call

And I'll be there, yes I will

You've got a friend

Another way to think about friends is this simple exercise. If you can, draw on a piece of paper a small square, about two inches on each side. Now, think of the people in your life who you can call at 2 a.m. if you are in trouble, the people who will be honest with you, the people who you can let your hair down with and be your authentic self with no fear of judgment, the ones you have shared the depths of your heart. Write their names in that square. The square is intentionally small to force you to limit the number of names you can put in there. These are your closest friends. Those few special people whose names you have written in that square is your square squad.

Your square squad reflects this reality that we as human beings are only capable of having a few close friends. Of course, we can have literally thousands of acquaintances. We can have lots of people in our lives that we would call friends. But that deep, intimate bond of friendship takes many years of relationship. You have to have many experiences together. It’s a relationship that has to continue to be nurtured. That takes time. That trust has to be built up. No matter how friendly and outgoing we are, our square squad is going to be a small square of friends. And what a blessing it is to have that square of friends that you can rely on in your time of need. 

With all this in mind, this is what is so amazing about our relationship with Jesus. When Jesus says that he is your friend, he doesn’t mean that he is an acquaintance, or just a friend, or a Facebook friend. He is in your square squad. He is in your inner circle. He is one you can bare your soul to, the one you can call out to at 2 a.m., the one who will always be there for you, winter, spring, summer or fall.

Let’s see what else Jesus says about being our friend. He said, “I do not call you servants any longer, I call you friends.” That word “servant” is a soft translation of the Greek. The accurate word is “slave.” But we of course can’t relate to that term. A better way for us to think of it is like an employer/employee relationship. If you are the employee, you have a specific job to do and your boss supervises your work. You have a relationship with your boss. You probably have some kind of evaluation process. Your boss is hopefully friendly and supportive. But it’s unlikely that you are in the board room when the big decisions are being made. You don’t have an inside view on the big picture. As Jesus put it, the slave does not know what the master is doing. The employee is not in on all that is going on in the executive suite. You just do your job. But it’s not like that with Jesus. We aren’t employees or hired hands. Our relationship with Jesus is not on a need-to-know basis. Jesus has invited us into the inner sanctum. We are in on what God is up to. We have access to the executive suite. We are in Jesus’ square squad.

What else does Jesus say? “No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” Think again of those people that are in your square squad. Would you be willing to lay down your life for them? Honestly, that is asking a lot, isn’t it? Like Jesus said, is there any greater sacrifice anyone would be willing to make than to die for their friend? That is great love. If you are willing to lay down your life for someone, that would be an indication that they are in your square squad. And this is why we can affirm that we are in Jesus’ square squad. Jesus loved you and me so much that he was willing to lay down his life for us. As a friend, Jesus laid down his life for you and for me. We are in Jesus’ square squad.

Now, here’s the kicker. Jesus said, “You did not choose me, I chose you.” When it came to establishing this intimate friendship between us and Jesus, Jesus made the first move. Imagine yourself in a room full of people you do not know. You are among so many people but feel all alone. You are sitting on a couch by yourself and wondering if you fit in, if you belong. You are feeling so lonely. You wonder if you got up and left if anyone would notice. But then someone approaches you. They introduce themselves, sit down next to you, and start having a conversation with you, to get to know you. They exude interest in you. They believe you are the most important person in the room. Right away, you are sensing a connection with this person. You can tell that they want to be your friend. That’s sort of what it is like with Jesus. We didn’t have to search Jesus out. We didn’t have to get Jesus’ attention. We didn’t have to do anything. Jesus approached us. Jesus got our attention. Jesus chose to be our friend. It is Jesus who comes to us with open arms and an open heart to initiate that intimate friendship, just as we are. We were just sitting there and minding our own business until Jesus showed up into our life. As far as Jesus is concerned, he includes us in his square squad.

So, let’s go back to that first statement. “You are my friends if you do what I command you.” What command is that? Jesus answered that. “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.” How has Jesus loved us? As a dear friend. How do you love your closest friends? That gives you your example of what it means to love one another as Jesus loves you. This is a commandment that we can understand and that we can follow. It even comes naturally. That’s what friends do…they love each other. 

It’s still true. We are only humanly capable of having a few close friends. It is too much to love every person with the same depth and intimacy as we love our dearest friends. But that doesn’t mean we can’t choose to relate to one another, and to any person we interact with, as a friend. We can extend a hand of friendship. We can desire to be a friend to others. Especially when we see someone who is lonely, who looks like they need a friend, we can be the ones who reach out to them. At the minimum, we can strive to treat everyone as a friend, to aim to love people with the love of a friend.

Because the truth is that every person we encounter is a friend of Jesus, whether they know it or not. We know this to be true because Jesus laid down his life for every person that will ever live. Jesus loves every person as an intimate friend. We may only be able to have a few people in our square squad. But Jesus’ square squad is without limit. Every person fits in Jesus’ square squad. So, when you interact with someone, whether they be a close friend, a bagger at the grocery store, or someone sitting on a bench in the park, you are interacting with one of Jesus’ friends. There’s that old saying, “Anyone who is a friend of yours is a friend of mine.” If anyone is a friend of Jesus, can they not be a friend to us?