Doing Life Together

Based on Acts 9:36-43

Mother’s Day is a tricky day to celebrate. For those of us who are mothers or whose mothers are still alive and we have a relationship with, then this is a nice day to be appreciated or to appreciate. It’s nice to have a day where your children let you know how much they appreciate you. And it is a nice prompt for us to let our moms know how much we appreciate them.

The tricky part is if you are not a mother. Or your mother is no longer alive. Or you don’t have a relationship with your mother. If this is your situation, then Mother’s Day can bring up some difficult emotions, maybe some grief, some bitterness, a feeling of being left out. It’s the same with Father’s Day next month. These days of appreciating moms or dads are nice for those who are moms and dads. But not for everyone. It is important to be sensitive to this reality, that Mother’s Day does not bring warm and positive feelings to everybody. Mother’s Day for many people is bittersweet.

Today we hear about a woman who was being honored, but it was bittersweet. Tabitha was deeply loved by the community. We learn that she was known for her many good works. She was a pillar in the community. When there were needs in the community, people looked to Tabitha. She was always giving of herself. Apparently, she especially used her talent for clothes making, having made garments for the widows who were in the community. But Tabitha fell ill and passed away. The community was shaken. Everyone felt the loss.

I want to say a quick word about widows. In those days in the Christian community widows had a special calling all their own. Actually, this was the case among Jews, not just Christians, who had been instructed by God of the need for the community to care for widows and orphans. I Timothy 5 gives us some insight on the special place that widows had in the community. They are to be supported by the community and in return widows are to pray continually for their community. I suspect that the widows had been praying hard for Tabitha who perhaps was a widow herself, we don’t know for sure. We can imagine that as Tabitha was drawing her last breath, she was surrounded by these widows as they prayed for her healing.

Having heard that Peter was in a nearby town, two men were sent to him to ask him to come right away with them so that he could see Tabitha. Did Peter know who Tabitha was? Maybe. Did they want Peter to hurry to see Tabitha because they wanted him to maybe perform a miracle? If that was their motivation, they kept it to themselves. If we take the story at face value, this was a situation where a pillar of the community had died and it is appropriate for Peter to come and see, to simply be present and share in the grief of the community.

By the way, there are a couple other details in this story that stresses how special Tabitha is. For one, she is known by two names, Tabitha, which is Aramaic, and Dorcas, which is Greek, a word that means “Gazelle.” Only a few other people in the New Testament had two names: Peter who is also known as Simon, John who is also known as Mark, and Saul who is also known as Paul. But here is the kicker. Tabitha is the only woman in the New Testament who is explicitly identified as a disciple. Her status is high. It was right for Peter to come quickly to see Tabitha before she was placed in a tomb.

That was at least one of the reasons why they wanted Peter to come quickly. The clock was ticking. They had washed her body and laid her out on a bed in the upper room. But she had not yet been anointed or had her body wrapped and prepared for burial. This was a narrow window of time where people could see her body, to see her face, before they had to place the body in a tomb. If Peter was going to have an opportunity to see Tabitha it had to be now. So, Peter goes with the men, and they hurry to Joppa to see Tabitha.

Can you picture the scene? Peter is led to the upper room where Tabitha’s body is laid out. The widows are still gathered around the body. They show Peter the clothes they are wearing that Tabitha had made for them, surely clothes that were made with love for each one of those women. A part of Tabitha was woven into those garments. How precious those clothes must have been for those widows, so much so that they wanted Peter to see them. It must have been an emotionally charged moment.

Perhaps this scene brought to mind an experience that Peter had with Jesus. A father’s girl was dying, and he rushed to Jesus pleading for him to come to his house and heal his daughter. But before they got to the house, the father received the word that his daughter had died. But that didn’t stop Jesus. They went on to the house filled with the sounds of weeping and moaning. Jesus sends everyone out of the room where the girl was except for the parents, Peter, James, and John. They got to see Jesus bring the girl back to life. Bringing this experience to his mind, Peter ushers the widows out of the room, closes the door, and falls on his knees praying that through the power of the Holy Spirit Jesus might bring Tabitha back to life.

While the widows and the other disciples were gathered on the other side of that door wondering what was going on inside that room, suddenly, Peter opens the door holding the hand of Tabitha who was standing beside him. The grief and sorrow are instantly turned into joy. And many people in the community came to belief in Jesus, the one whom Tabitha had been a faithful follower, the one who had given her life purpose to love this community. It’s a happy ending. The whole community is filled with celebration. They will have more time with Tabitha.

But we don’t always get those happy endings. We are happy for Tabitha and her community. Good for Tabitha. She will get to live some more years until she dies a second time. But we have not had that experience. For those of us who have lost our mothers to death, we didn’t get more time. Especially for those of us who have lost someone they love recently; this story is bittersweet. We can be happy for Tabitha and her community but there is a pang in our hearts and maybe even a little bitterness. Why did Tabitha get to have more life but not my mother? It almost feels a little unfair. I wonder if there were those in the community who, although were celebrating and happy that Tabitha was alive again, also had a tinge of longing that this could have happened to the one they loved. Even in that moment of celebration, for some, it may have been a little bittersweet.

What stands out to me most in this story though is how the whole community was engaged. They participated in the grief as well as the rejoicing after Tabitha was brought back to life. Tabitha had given all she had for the community through her love and good works. She provided beautiful garments for the widows. The widows were gathered around her when she died. When people heard that Peter was over in Lydda, two men went right away to find Peter and tell him he needed to come. When Jesus, not Peter, restored Tabitha’s life, Peter brought her out before the community so they could see for themselves. The whole community rejoiced. Many came to belief in Jesus because of this event. The only thing that happened in this story that didn’t involve the community was when Peter kicked everyone out of the room, so it was him alone with a lifeless body and the presence of the Holy Spirit. Other than that, this was a communal experience.

This is where I think we can draw inspiration from this story. It is highly unlikely that any of us will experience someone we love being dead for several hours and then through prayer be brought back to life. But this story reminds us that life is done in community. When someone dies, it affects all of us. We can be assured that the good works we do in this life are appreciated by the people we touch, that we can and do make a positive difference in the lives of others. It is a good thing to celebrate, honor people, and grieve together as a community. Attending public celebrations, public events that honor people, pubic prayer vigils where the community can grieve together, this is where the experience of life is enriched. It was our journey through the pandemic when we were reminded how much we need to be gathered. It is good for us to be together. Whether we are all feeling joyful, or feeling sad, or a combination of both, we are meant to do life as a community. Life is so much better that way.